My sweet precious Hadley,
I am pretty sure you just woke up a couple of weeks ago and decided "newborn" wasn't your style. Gone were the days of you laying around, patiently waiting for someone to entertain you. You want to go, you want to move. You are a constant reminder of how very much I need to perfect my art of multi-tasking. I hold you. Cooking dinner, eating dinner, reading a book, writing this blog. You love to be snuggled, but only as long as you can see your world. No laying down for you! Your big blue eyes take in everything, from your wild and crazy brother-bear to Momma and Daddy as we go about our business. Your little body can be so tired, but you would be fighting sleep. Always afraid to miss something, my little curious girl.
You have really completed our family Haddie Jo. You came at such a strange time for your Daddy. Your Nanny had taken a turn for the worse, but God sent you, our little angel to remind us all how beautiful life can be. & with you, it has been. I delight in seeing your big wide eyes every morning. I love that you sleep with us for the last part of the night, curled up under my arm and right next to my belly. I love that some mornings I open my eyes to find your tiny fingers splayed across my chest, close to my heart. & I love, love, love that sweet baby smell. You add a special warmth to Mommy & Daddy's bed that could never be replicated.
I am cherishing every moment we spend nursing. I have to remind myself that we worked so very hard to get where we are, and I am so thankful you were a patient learner and an even stronger fighter. We knew what we wanted and look at us now! We spend a couple times a day, holed up in a comfy chair just getting to know one another. It's invaluable time that I have to sit still for a moment and just be with you. It's a moment I can watch your little lashes as you finally nod off to sleep. Sometimes you aren't tired. Sometimes its a battle to get you to eat, you are so happy. More often than not you spend your time eating breaking your latch in big gummy grins. Those are without a doubt my favorite smiles. Milk dribbling out, you are in a state of pure bliss. & the feeling is mutual my girl.
I know that you are growing. I can see it every day in the new things you learn, your excited new expressions and your fierce personality that is coming to light. I know it, but my heart simply aches at the thought of losing my little baby girl. Part of me is so thrilled for the days of doing "Mommy & Me" things. Baking in the kitchen, being crafty together, getting our nails done, picking out the perfect party dress. Another part of me wants you forever like this, chunky and sweet and completely mine. Before you grow up and the world takes you I hope you know you were incredibly cherished just as you are. I always said I would never call my girls, "Princess." but that is definitely what you are sweet babe. My perfect, pretty Princess. Even if God had let me custom pick a baby, there is none other that could be as wonderful as you. He knew exactly what he was doing when he sent us you. To the moon and back my little one...
-Mommy
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